Today, we have a real nail-biter of a case: "I Will Not Eat My Own Socks!"
Plaintiff, Pupper, has brought suit against defendant, Pupper's Sock Goblin Twin, alleging emotional distress and trauma due to excessive sock pilfering.
The court has been presented with evidence that the Sock Goblin Twin has been stealing Pupper's favorite socks at an alarming rate, with some estimates as high as 37% of Pupper's entire sock collection.
The Sock Goblin Twin has been accused of using advanced sock-napping techniques, including but not limited to: hiding socks in plain sight, using sock-sucking vortex, and deploying sock-ninja squad.
As the case is still ongoing, the fate of Pupper's socks remains uncertain, but rest assured, the court will not rest until justice is served.