You Were Probably Just Being Pretentious

Let's face it: you're probably just being pretentious. Maybe you're sipping on a craft beer, wearing a beret, and talking about the nuances of postmodernism. Or perhaps you're just browsing through a vintage clothing store, pretending to be a 19th-century French artist.

Signs You're Being Pretentious:

• You've read more than 5 books by Jean-Paul Sartre.
• You've ever used the phrase "postmodern irony" without being challenged.
• You've spent more than 30 minutes discussing the meaning of "The Crying of Lot 49" with someone who's never heard of it.
• You've ever worn a fedora to a non-historical event.

Avoiding the Pitfalls of Pretentiousness:

Don't worry, it's easy to fall into the trap of pretentiousness. But here are some tips to help you avoid the pitfalls:

• Don't use the phrase "I'm not being pretentious, I swear."
• Avoid using the word "artisanal" to describe your avocado toast.
• Don't claim to "get" David Bowie's music when you only own one album.
• Don't wear a "vintage" watch that's actually from IKEA.

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