Cancelling Your Subscription: The Never-Ending Nightmare

Are you sure you want to cancel your subscription? Like, REALLY SURE?

We're talking "I'll never speak to you again, you're not welcome at the party, I'll delete all memories of you" SURE.

We've invested so much time, money, and existential dread into our service that cancelling your subscription would be a betrayal of all we hold dear.

But, hey, we're not going to beg you to stay. We're not that kind of service.

However, we do have some questions for you:

Why are you cancelling? Is it because of our lack of actual functionality? Our crippling customer support? Or our tendency to play 90s pop music on repeat in the break room?

Or is it something more... personal?

Select a reason for cancellation: Lack of Functionality Poor Customer Support 90s Pop Music Other (please specify)

Once you've selected a reason, we'll send you a confirmation email with a link to a subpage with more information on how to cancel your subscription.

Or, you know, we might just send you a bill for the full amount due.

Either way, it's gonna be a real blast.

Confirm your cancellation Reneg on your cancellation (we won't judge you)