Here are a few ways to deflect romantic advances without actually being mean or rude.
When a suitor tries to wake you up for coffee, simply say "I'm not a morning person" and pretend to roll over. This works 9 times out of 10.
Subpage 1: The "I'm Not a Morning Person" Deflection: Advanced TechniquesOr, if they insist on trying to wake you up, use this handy Silence-o-matic 3000 to deflect their advances with an impenetrable wall of silence.
Tell your suitor you're on a deadline, but be sure to specify it's a deadline for a fictional project, like "I have to finish this novel about a talking pineapple" or "I have to meet a client about a new line of cat food." This usually buys you 24-48 hours of deflection time.
Subpage 2: The "I'm on a Deadline" Deflection: Advanced TechniquesOr, if they ask to join you for a romantic dinner, suggest a "working dinner" where you'll just be eating takeout and working on your "project." This way, they'll think you're a responsible adult with a deadline to meet, not a flibberdigibbited flouter who just likes to eat pizza by yourself in your pajamas.
Deflect their advances with a well-timed !