Because the abyss of nothingness is just too... nothingy.
Our patented, totally-not-made-up Derivation of Doom algorithm uses a complex series of nested if/else statements and recursive function calls to calculate the most likely outcome for any given set of inputs.
Try it out: Derivation Calculator
Or, if you're feeling lucky, try our Lucky Number Generator. But be warned: the odds of actually getting a decent number are slim.