What to Do When You Get Sent to Jail (aka "The Ultimate Guide to Inmate Etiquette")

Step 1: Don't Panic (Seriously, Don't Do That)

When you're locked up, it's easy to get caught up in the moment and start causing a scene. Don't. Just don't.

Instead, take a deep breath, and remember that you're not exactly in the most comfortable of situations.

Step 2: Find Your Bunkmate

Meet the guy who's been in here for 5 years for 'borrowing' a neighbor's toaster. He's a real character.

He'll introduce you to the prison's 'hierarchy' and teach you the art of doing nothing for 8 hours a day.

Step 3: Learn the Prison Slang

There's a whole language that's been developed in here. 'Slo' means 'slow', 'tall' means 'tall', and 'flop' means 'flop'.

Don't worry, it's not that hard.

Step 4: Find the 'Canteen'

It's the cafeteria, but don't call it that. Call it the 'Canteen'. It's a thing.

They serve 'mystery meat' which is basically just a meat-flavored paste served on a bed of rice.

Step 5: Make Friends with a CO

They're not as scary as they seem. Unless you're a 'troublemaker', then they'll be your worst nightmare.

Just be nice, and they might even give you an extra slice of 'mystery meat'.

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