EMPLOYMENT APPLICATION

We're looking for you, but not really

Fill out the form below if you're willing to risk it all for a job that's 90% boredom and 10% existential dread

Your Name: Your Email: Your Phone Number:

*Please note that we have a zero-tolerance policy for boredom, and a -100% policy for actual talent.

*Please select one of the following reasons for applying:

I'm escaping my parents and need a place to hide
I'm looking for a job that gives me meaning, or at least, a paycheck that gives me enough money to afford meaning
I'm trying to get away from my spouse, and a cubicle is the perfect place to start