Appendix 27B: The Unofficial Guide to Properly Breaking Things

Warning: The following methods are not actually recommended. Please do not try this at home.

Method 1: The Sudden and Merciless Slam

This method involves slamming a heavy object into your wall with all the finesse of a drunken elephant.

See Method 1 in action

Method 2: The Sustained and Frustrating Tug

This method requires a great deal of patience, but yields results that are almost as satisfying as a root canal.

See Method 2 in action

Method 3: The Unpredictable and Unreliable Fling

This method is best used when you are feeling lucky. And by "lucky," I mean "completely out of luck."

See Method 3 in action