ENFORCEMENT OF MANDATORY MOUSTACHE MAINTENANCE

Section 2.1.2.3 of the Intergalactic Union of Fuzzy Creatures' (IUF) Code of Conduct dictates that all members with visible facial hair must adhere to a strict grooming policy.

Failure to do so will result in severe penalties, including but not limited to:

• Forced viewing of reruns of 'The Muppet Show'
• Assignment of a designated 'Moustache Monitor' to follow you everywhere
• Temporary reassignment to the 'Bureaucratic Red Tape' department

For more information on the proper care and maintenance of your majestic mane, visit:

• Section 2.1.2.3.3: Advanced Moustache Techniques
• Section 2.1.2.3.4: The Consequences of Moustache Neglect