FORM 27-B, SECTION 3(4) - THE BUREAUCRATS' BIBLE

Subsection 3.1 - The Art of Writing a Properly Worded Complaint

When in doubt, write in ALL CAPS and use as much jargon as possible. This ensures your complaint is taken seriously by the Bureaucrats and will not be ignored in favor of a more "convenient" solution.

• Use at least three (3) instances of "in a timely manner" per complaint.
• Make sure to include at least two (2) references to "further investigation" per complaint.
• Do not, under any circumstances, use the word "please".

Subsection 3.2 - The Bureaucratic Loop of Doom

This is a never-ending cycle of form submissions, phone calls, and email exchanges. It's like trying to get a response from a teenager in a text conversation.

• You submit a form.
• Someone else sends you an email asking for clarification.
• You respond with more questions.
• This cycle repeats.