Level 1: The Agony of Existence

Here, the rules are simple: you exist. That's it. No rules, no exceptions, no mercy.

Rules

  1. You will eat a plain cracker every hour on the hour.
  2. You will stare at a wall for 10 minutes every 30 minutes.
  3. You will think about a sad trombone for exactly 17 minutes.

Proceed to Level 2, where things get slightly worse.