Zero Tolerance Protocol: Our Security Team is Actually Very Nice

As you may have noticed, we're not your average security team. We're not here to ruin your fun or make you feel like you're in a bad place. Nope. We're here to make sure the internet is a safe and fun place for everyone, even you.

Our Methods:

• We have cameras in every corner, watching your every move.
• We have algorithms that can predict your every thought.
• We have a team of highly trained, highly caffeinated specialists who are ready to pounce on any hint of trouble.

But don't worry, we're not all about the stick. We also have:

• A foosball table in the break room.
• A fridge full of free snacks.
• A "no meetings" policy (except on Fridays).

So come on down and see us! We promise not to make you feel too uncomfortable. Unless you're doing something bad. Then we'll have to do something about it.

Subpage 4: Our Security Team's Secret Talent Show Subpage 2: Our Top-Secret Surveillance Methods