Zero-Tolerance Protocol Manual

Section 1: Introduction

Warning: This manual is for advanced users only. If you're not prepared to face the consequences of our zero-tolerance policy, please leave immediately.

Section 2: Consequences of Non-Compliance

Non-compliance will be met with extreme prejudice. Offenders will be subjected to:

• Immediate reeducation through forced watching of our corporate-sponsored propaganda videos
• Randomized and unpredictable periods of forced silence
• Public shaming on the company's internal social media

And if you're still not getting the message, you'll face the ultimate consequence:

Section 3: Reporting Non-Compliance

Don't even think about trying to sneak past us. If you're caught in the act, report yourself to: