Week 10 of Zero Tolerance Protocol - Failed Experiments

Experiments Gone Wrong:

The attempt to turn the office coffee machine into a functioning time machine resulted in a 3-hour coffee break.
The experiment to replace all office chairs with giant hamster balls ended in a 5-day meeting to discuss the logistics.
The test subject who tried to eat a spoonful of wasabi sauce for "scientific research purposes" now has a permanently runny nose.

Stay tuned for next week's thrilling report on "The Ethics of Mandatory Friday Afternoon Naps"!