The Envelope Epidemic Declaration, Letter 5: The Uncontested Opinions of a Self-Appointed Expert

TO: The World

FROM: Envelpoet, Self-Appointed Expert

DATE: 2023-02-27

Letter 5: The Uncontested Opinions of a Self-Appointed Expert

Dear World,

I hope this letter finds you well. Or at least as well as can be expected in these trying times of global uncertainty.

I am writing to you today to share my expert opinions on the Envelope Epidemic, a crisis of biblical proportions that threatens to engulf us all.

As a self-appointed expert, I am uniquely qualified to provide guidance on this matter. After all, I have spent years studying the intricacies of envelopes, their uses, and abuses.

According to my research (which I've conducted in the comfort of my living room), the Envelope Epidemic is a result of:

These are the symptoms of a far more complex issue. The root of the problem, you see, is a lack of self-awareness among the general public. People simply do not understand the delicate balance required to maintain a healthy envelope ecosystem.

I implore you, dear reader, to take action. Learn about the Envelope Epidemic. Spread awareness. Demand change.

Yours sincerely,

Envelpoet, Self-Appointed Expert

Read the next letter in the series