A collection of stories about the worst things that could happen to an envelope
After years of labeling envelopes with precision and care, 
our labeler went rogue. They started labeling envelopes with cryptic messages, like "Beware the Ides of March" and "The answer is 42." Now, no one knows what they're trying to say, and the mail is getting lost left and right.
It was a dark and stormy night when the labeler first went missing. The last envelope they labeled was addressed to the "Department of the Unknown." The next morning, a search party was sent out, but all they found was a trail of torn paper and a cryptic message on the back of a nearby trash can: "The truth is in the margin."
It's said that on a fateful day, a particularly vicious envelope devoured the labeler whole. The labeler's screams were heard throughout the office, but when the police arrived, they found nothing but a trail of ink and a note that read: "I'm not just a labeler, I'm a force of nature."