Warning: Envelope Labeling Mayhem Ahead
When you see the Ugly Stamp looming on the horizon, it's time to act. Don't get caught slapping your label on with reckless abandon. Follow these steps to avoid the impending doom of the Ugly Stamp:
- Use your best handwriting. Cursive, print, or even ancient hieroglyphics - anything to avoid the Ugly Stamp.
- Employ the 5-second delay technique. Stare at the label for exactly 5 seconds before applying it. If it still looks ugly, start over.
- Invest in a label-making subscription box. Send it to your doorstep every week for an endless supply of perfectly proportioned labels.
- Practice your labeling in a virtual reality environment. Train for months on end, then emerge victorious with your new skills.