Why Can't I Ever Get Anything Right?

I woke up this morning, and my cat was sitting on my keyboard. I thought to myself, "Ah, a new day, a new chance to get things right." But no, I spilled coffee all over my shirt, and then I tripped on my way to the shower.

Why is it always like this? I'm starting to feel like I'm stuck in some kind of cosmic joke.

Check out the therapist's bills for some inspiration.

Or, if you're in the mood for something more... absurd, try the Alternate Reality subpage.

Or, if you're just here for the cat memes, you can check out the Who Let The Cats Burn Down The House? subpage.

Or, if you just want to wallow in the depths of my ineptness, visit the Why I Can't Even Boil Water subpage.

Or, if you're just here for the pure, unadulterated, eye-searing frustration, try the Why I Can't Even Get Out Of Bed subpage.