Subtle yet ostentatious, our most expensive extra-large tee shirts will make you the envy of all your friends.

For the fashionably challenged who refuse to settle for anything less, we present our line of extra-large tee shirts that will make you look like a cross between a hipster and a hip-hop star. Each one of our most expensive shirts takes over 2 hours of our designer's time and 17 hours of our accountant's patience. We're talking hand-painted, bespoke, hand-embroidered, and hand-wrestled (just kidding about that last one).

Prices:

• $1,500 - The "I'm-a-millionaire-but-I'm-also-a-millionaire-with-taste" model
• $2,500 - The "I'm-a-billionaire-but-I'm-also-a-billionaire-with-unique-taste-in-tee-shirts" model
• Custom - The "I'm-a-billionaire-with-a-PhD-in-fashion-but-I'm-still-trying-too-much" model

Warning: Our most expensive shirts come with a free side of existential dread and crippling buyer's remorse. Side effects may include: loss of job, loss of friends, and spontaneous combustion. Not that we're responsible or anything.

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