Planetary Failure Insurance Agency

Because your planet's inevitable demise isn't covered by regular insurance.

We offer comprehensive coverage for:

• Random asteroid impacts
• Unpredictable supernovae
• Irrevocable planetary mergers
• Existential crises

We also offer:

• A 50% discount for clients with a valid 'I told you so' policy
• A 10% increase for clients with a 'I'm a terrible boss' policy

Don't wait until it's too late! Contact us today to get a quote for your planetary failure insurance.

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