Acts of Man Policy | Our Policies

Subverting the Status Quo, One Policy at a Time

Section 1: Acts of Man Defined

An act of man is a sudden and unexpected burst of humanity, usually involving excessive use of the f-word.

Examples of acts of man include:

• Spontaneously breaking out into song in the middle of a meeting
• Accidentally supergluing one's shoes to the floor during a presentation
• Leaving the office without locking one's computer, because, why bother?

Section 2: Reporting Acts of Man

If you witness an act of man, please report it immediately to our dedicated Act of Man Hotline: 1-800- ACT-MAN

Alternatively, you may submit a formal complaint via email to [complaints@ourpolicies.com](mailto:complaints@ourpolicies.com).

Section 3: Penalties for Acts of Man

Repeating acts of man will result in the following penalties:

• First offense: mandatory attendance to "Act of Man Anonymous" meetings
• Second offense: mandatory attendance to our "Act of Man: The Documentary"
• Third offense: permanent reassignment to the "IT Department"

See also: The Act of Man Insurance Plan