Are you tired of living in a world where you have to choose between eating ramen noodles for every meal and buying socks that aren't held together with duct tape? Well, buckle up, buttercup, because today we're talking about the fundamentals of budgeting!
Step 1: Track Your Income
Get a job, any job, as long as it pays in cash. Don't worry about the soul-sucking corporate overlords or the existential dread of being a cog in a machine. Just get the benjamins, baby!
- Wages: $1,000/month (minus taxes, minus rent, minus ramen)
- Freelance gigs: $200/month ( minus taxes, minus rent, minus ramen)
- Uncle's allowance: $500/month (minus taxes, minus rent, minus ramen)
Step 2: Track Your Expenses
Ramen noodles: $5/meal x 5 meals = $25/week (don't forget the sauce, it's $2 extra)
- Utilities: $100/month (electricity, water, and internet, oh my!)
- Rent: $500/month (plus $100 for a broken toilet)
- Netflix: $15/month (streaming, but not too streaming)
Step 3: Create a Budget Plan
Now that you have all this info, it's time to create a budget that doesn't suck!
50/30/20: 50% for necessities (ramen, rent, utilities), 30% for discretionary spending (socks, streaming services), 20% for saving (for the inevitable apocalypse)