The Grinder Schedule: A Timely Guide to Existence

Grinding Schedule for the Average Existential Crisis

Grinding Schedule for the Aspiring Time Lord

Grinding Schedule for the Overcaffeinated Cogito

Wake up every morning at 4:45 AM, precisely.

Caffeinate with 4 cups of espresso, no less.

Consume 3 hours of existential philosophy before breakfast.

Spend 2 hours on the treadmill.

Take a 10-minute pause to contemplate the meaninglessness of existence.

Repeat as necessary.

For those struggling with their coffee habit, seek help here.

Take your existential crisis to the next level.

Learn to harness the power of quantum mechanics to fuel your existential despair.