Heap Catastrophe 1/7: Don't Panic

You know that feeling when you're standing at the edge of a giant pile of trash, staring into the void of uncertainty? No, that's not just existential dread, that's a Heap Catastrophe. But don't worry, we're here to help you avoid it.

• Step 1: Take a deep breath, and try not to think about the impending doom of a dumpster fire.
• Step 2: Call a friend, or better yet, a professional.
• Step 3: Consider the long-term consequences of your actions, or lack thereof. (Just don't think about the short-term, that's just too much for anyone.)