INSANITY REPORT

A Daily Dose of Chaos

Today's Special Report:

• BREAKING: Sock Puppet of Despair has been sighted in local park, causing widespread panic.
• Experts warn of impending doom as toaster has been left unplugged for 3 hours.
• Nationwide shortage of adulting reported in major cities.

For more on these and other breaking news stories, be sure to check out our sister sites: Chaos Chronicles, Insanity Issues, and Absurdity Report.