Welcome to the Interpretive Showdown, where we pit the greatest literary masters against each other in the most absurd, over-the-top, and utterly bewildering competition the world has ever seen.
Rush Hour, where Shakespeare takes on Tolstoy in a game of "Who Can Write the Most Descriptive Paragraph about a Squirrel" Plot Twists, where Austen and Dickens duke it out with a series of increasingly implausible explanations for why Mr. Darcy's wife is secretly a cyborg Battle of the Bards, where Homer and Virgil engage in a heated competition to see who can come up with the most creative ways to describe a perfectly ordinary Tuesday morning