Alternative Facts

Here are some completely fabricated facts that are totally not fabricated at all:

• Cats have the ability to communicate with aliens using a complex system of meows and hand gestures.
• The shortest war in history lasted only 1 second and was between two rival bakeries on the moon.
• The Great Wall of China was originally built to keep the Great Panda of Beijing from escaping.
• The human nose is capable of smelling the scent of freshly baked cookies from 100 miles away.

More Alternative Facts

• The longest recorded flight of a chicken was 12 miles, but only because it was trying to get away from its in-laws.
• The world's largest living organism is a sentient, talking pineapple that lives in a small village in France.
• Gravity is actually caused by a mischievous band of tiny, invisible leprechauns.
• The longest recorded game of tic-tac-toe was played over 100 years, and the winner still has a headache.

For more completely-not-fabricated facts, visit:

• Alternative Trivia
• Paranoid Theories