Itinerary for S.O.S.S. (Self-Optimizing Sleeping Society)

Day 1: Wake-up and stretch. Realize you're still on S.O.S.S. duty.

10:00 AM - Morning Briefing: Listen to the S.O.S.S. anthem ("Wake Me Up When It's S.O.S.S. Time")

11:00 AM - S.O.S.S. Self-Care: Practice the 5-minute stare into the void

12:00 PM - Lunchtime: Eat 5 pounds of pizza to fuel your S.O.S.S. operations

S.O.S.S.-mandated Nap Time

S.O.S.S.-mandated Nap Time

Falling asleep is not an option. You have a S.O.S.S. duty to complete!

15:00 PM - Wake up. Rejoin the S.O.S.S. fold.

Caffeine Injection Protocol