Warning: This Friday is going to be a real treat. Meetings will start at 5 AM. Coffee will be lukewarm. And your favorite coworker will be wearing a 'I'm with Stupid' t-shirt again.
This is not a drill. Do not panic. Just pretend you're a functioning member of society and show up to work on time.
For those who insist on being fashionably late, please note that our CEO has declared this Friday 'Wacky Hair Day'.