After months of research, I, Lemmy, have finally uncovered the shocking truth: Socks are not just missing in the wash, they have been stolen!
It's a vast network of underground bunkers, hidden in plain sight. Socks go in, but never come out. The evidence points to The Sock Ninja, a mastermind of deceit and missing footwear.
But don't worry, I, Lemmy, have a solution to this dastardly plot. Stay tuned for further updates.
Join the Sock Rescue Team and help me bring down the Sock Ninja!