It's not just a problem, it's a national emergency.
Apparently, my ex-wife lost our passport while trying to escape the authorities.
Now, we're stuck in no man's land with nothing but a map and a bad attitude.
Want to help us get back home? Click here to donate some snacks and a compass.
Or, if you're feeling generous, click here to book us a flight back to reality.
We're not asking for much, but a decent Wi-Fi signal would be nice.