Compliance Officer Training: Where Bureaucratic Red Tape Goes to School

Welcome, Compliance Officers in Training! Today's agenda includes:

• How to fill out a 37-page expense report with a pen that's been certified by our corporate accountants.
• The art of writing a strongly-worded letter that will make even the most hardened corporate lawyer cry.
• A hands-on guide to the art of finding creative ways to say "no" to that new coffee machine without actually saying "no".

Next up: our special guest lecturer, Compliance Officer Extraordinaire, will be discussing the finer points of MOU Entanglement!

Don't forget to wear your best "I'm-a-compliance-officer-and-I-can-see-you" face for our group photo opportunity!

Also, remember: if you see a stapler, do not attempt to use it as a makeshift coffee mug. Trust us.