Mandate Ethics - A Code of Conduct for the Incompetent

Article I: Thou Shalt Not Embarrass Thyself

Section 1.1: Avoidance of Sudden Onset Silliness

In the event of a sudden and unexplained urge to breakdance in the break room, the afflicted individual shall first consult the Mandate Mandate Manual.

Section 1.2: The Art of Apology

When confronted with the consequences of one's actions, the following script shall be used:

• Step 1: Deny all involvement
• Step 2: Blame the coffee machine
• Step 3: Plead the fifth

Article II: Thou Shalt Not Overstay in the Breakroom

Section 2.1: The 15-Minute Rule

Any individual found to have overstayed their allotted time in the breakroom for 5 minutes or more shall be subject to disciplinary action.

Section 2.2: The Microwave Conundrum

When reheating food in the breakroom, the following protocol shall be followed:

1. Step 1: Check the expiration date of the food
2. Step 2: Check the contents of the fridge for mysterious growths
3. Step 3: Microwave for 3.14 seconds, then immediately stop

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Mandate Benefits - The Unseen Perks