By the power vested in us, we hereby mandate that all citizens must have access to the finest, crispiest french fries in the land.
Any attempts to restrict or deny this fundamental right shall be met with swift and merciless punishment, including but not limited to: forced viewing of reruns of "The Great British Baking Show", mandatory attendance at a reenactment of a 90s boy band concert, or forced consumption of an entire jar of mayonnaise.
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