By order of the Council of Farting Wizards, we proudly declare this year's Flatulent Artisans Mandate:
Awarded to: BubbleGum Industries for their innovative new line of edible, glittering, explosive flatulence-repellent charms.
These charms, made from the finest imported space-age materials, have been scientifically proven to repel flatulence up to 97.42% while simultaneously emitting a mesmerizing array of colors and sounds.
As a result, BubbleGum Industries has been granted the prestigious Golden Gassy award, a certificate, and a year's supply of free beans.