By order of the Avocado Overlords, all humans are hereby forbidden from touching, handling, or otherwise coming within a 10-foot radius of any avocados. Failure to comply will result in the immediate activation of the Avocado Defense System, a.k.a. The Guac-to-Mechanism.
Why, you ask? Well, it's simple: avocados are the lifeblood of our civilization. They are the source of all our guacamole, and thus, all our joy. Don't even think about it.
Stay safe, stay vigilant, and for the love of all that's good, don't touch our avocados!