MEAT: The Unapologetic, Unapologetic Rules

Rule 1: Always eat breakfast. Don't be that guy who eats a salad for breakfast. You're not a hippie, you're just not a winner.

Rule 2: If you see a potted plant, punch it. It's just a plant, but still, it's a good punch.

Rule 3: If someone asks you to "hold up" or "wait just a minute," tell them you're allergic to minutes. See how long that takes.

Rule 4: Never use a word you can say without making a face. No "um"s, no "ah"s. You're a MEAT master.

Learn more about our rules and regulations. Bacon: The Unsustainable Resource. Eggs: The Unbeatable Solution.