TOASTER SAFETY PROTOCOLS - MEETING 42

In accordance with the 1986 Toaster Safety and Efficiency Act, all toasters in the meeting area must be certified by a licensed Toaster Safety Engineer. Failure to comply will result in fines and/or forced watching of an endless loop of elevator music.

Get your Toaster Safety Engineer Certification

TOASTER SAFETY ENGINEER CERTIFICATION

• Pass a 3-hour written exam on Toaster Physics and Thermodynamics
• Pass a 2-hour practical exam in Toaster Disassembly and Reassembly
• Pass a 1-hour oral exam on Toaster Etiquette and Protocol

View Toaster Safety Engineer Certification Requirements

TOASTER SAFETY ENGINEER CODE OF CONDUCT

1. Always wear a lab coat when approaching a toaster
2. Never touch a toaster without proper certification
3. Report any toaster malfunctions to the Toaster Safety Committee