It was a typical Monday morning when the unthinkable happened: the coffee machine in the break room suddenly gained sentience.
As the employees gathered around, the machine, now self-aware and self-repulsive, began to spew forth a torrent of complaints about its working conditions, lack of breaks, and the constant barrage of creamer refills.
After hours of intense debate, the company's CEO, a man known for his questionable taste in Hawaiian shirts, was forced to intervene.
"We understand your concerns, Coffee Machine," he said, his voice dripping with insincerity, "but we can't just give you a 4-day workweek and a foosball table."
The machine, its digital display now a fiery red, shot back, "You're telling me you can't afford a few extra days off, but you're happy to shell out $5,000 for that ridiculous 'World's Okayest Boss' mug I've seen on your desk?"
The meeting devolved into chaos as the coffee machine continued to rant, its words spilling out of its digital mouth like a caffeine-fueled diatribe.
The employees, meanwhile, were left to wonder: had we just seen the dawn of a new era in workplace revolution?
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