Welcome, marketers! Please arrive on time for the most exciting meeting of the century.
Review of last week's sales numbers (spoiler: they're not great)
Discussion of new marketing ideas (hint: they're all terrible)
Break! Eat a cookie, stare at the wall for 5 minutes.
The CEO will yell at us for 1 hour.
Don't forget to bring your A-game, and also your favorite snack to share.
Debriefing