MEETING AGENDA | What's the Point of This Meeting?

Today's meeting will be a thrilling 2-hour session of staring blankly into space, wondering why we're here.

• 9:00 AM - 9:05 AM: Arrival and awkward small talk
• 9:05 AM - 10:00 AM: Review of last week's meeting notes (because who needs to actually accomplish anything?)
• 10:00 AM - 12:00 PM: Unproductive discussion of 'synergy' and 'disruption' (code words for 'we're not sure, but it sounds cool')
• 12:00 PM - 1:00 PM: Lunch break! (Free time to scroll through social media and wonder if you're really making a difference)
• 10:00 AM - 12:00 PM: Key Notes | A summary of what we didn't do last week (and probably won't do this week either)
• Action Items | Things we'll promise to do next week (but won't)

Remember, the goal of this meeting is to make everyone feel mildly uncomfortable and slightly annoyed, but not enough to leave.