Financial Ruin: The Meeting Minutes

Meeting Summary

We have officially run out of money. The company is doomed. The CEO is hiding under the desk.

We are currently exploring options for panicking, including but not limited to:

• Playing the harmonica during the meeting to distract everyone from the impending doom
• Ordering pizza for everyone to temporarily forget their troubles
• Calling the bank to ask for more money (they said it's not a loan)

Next Meeting: Never. Because there won't be any more meetings.

Attendees

• The Unreliable Scribe
• John, the Guy Who Spilled Coffee on the Conference Room Table
• Jane, the One Who Ate the Last Donut
• The CEO, who is hiding under the desk

Decisions Made

• To have a "Let's all just pretend everything is fine" meeting every Friday
• To have the IT department install a "Please do not panic" button on every computer
• To have the CEO eat a whole pizza by himself

Next Steps

Send the "Let's all pretend everything is fine" meeting invitations to everyone on the email list

Cook the "Please do not panic" button

Call a "I'm not the CEO, I'm just the guy hiding under the desk" hotline