Implementation Guidelines for Ancient Arbitration Resolution 429

Section 1: Pre-Resolution Pacing

Ensure all parties are properly warmed up before commencing arbitration. This includes, but is not limited to: 30 minutes of stretching, 15 minutes of group meditation, and 5 minutes of awkward small talk.

Section 2: Resolution Protocol

Arbiters shall wear their most intimidating face during the resolution process. Failure to do so shall result in a 10% reduction in arbitration efficiency.

Section 3: Dispute Resolution Techniques

The following techniques are strictly forbidden during arbitration: passive-aggressive eye-rolling, the silent treatment, and excessive use of the word 'fine.'

For more information on these techniques, visit our Forbidden Dispute Resolution Techniques subpage.

Section 4: Post-Resolution Protocol

After the resolution, all parties shall partake in 20 minutes of group hugs, 10 minutes of group singing, and 5 minutes of awkwardly-planned group selfies.

For more information on post-resolution activities, visit our Post-Resolution Protocol subpage.

Subpages:

Forbidden Dispute Resolution Techniques

Post-Resolution Protocol