Dodging 101: A Guide to Not Getting Hit By That Speeding Bus

Warning: This guide is not responsible for actual injuries or fatalities. You're on your own.

Chapter 1: Anticipation

Before you can dodge, you must know when to dodge. Pay attention to the speed and trajectory of that bus. Is it accelerating? Decelerating? Does it have a tendency to veer off course?

Chapter 2: Reaction Time

When the time comes to act, you must act quickly. But not too quickly. You must be like a ninja, but not like a jackrabbit.

Chapter 3: Escape Routes

A good dodger always has a Plan B. A Plan C, D, E, and F as well. Be prepared to think on your feet and make a break for it.

Chapter 4: Post-Dodge Recovery

You made it out alive! Now, take some deep breaths, put on a nice cup of tea, and reflect on your dodging skills.