Advanced Training

For those who seek to transcend their mundane, terrestrial existence and ascend to the realm of pure, unadulterated metal.

Here, the air is thick with the scent of burning rubber and ozone, and the only sound is the distant thrumming of power chords.

Our advanced training regimen includes:

• Intensive sessions of sonic meditation
• Calisthenics for maximum muscle mass and flexibility
• Electroshock therapy for maximum neural efficiency

Don't be a poser. Join the ranks of the Metallic Mystic elite. Learn more about the levels of ascension