Paranoid Patterns Symposium 9000

Subtitle: Where the paranoid meet to plot world domination

We're not just a symposium, we're a manifesto for the paranoid elite. Join us and discover the art of:

• Spotting the plot from a mile away
• Reading between the lines like a boss
• Anticipating the apocalypse like a true visionary

Our speakers include:

• Professor Paranoidius, expert on all things paranoid
• Agent Xylophone, specialist in the art of surveillance
• Darth Paranoius, Sith Lord of paranoia