By Mouse Whispers, the world-renowned expert on Mouse Hacking.
Step 1: Disable your cat.
Step 2: Steal a laser pointer.
Step 3: Pretend it's a toy.
Step 1: Create an alias for 'cat' in your browser.
Step 2: Use it to log into the cat's account.
Step 1: Write a script to automate the cat's responses.
Step 2: Use the cat's AI to predict the user's every move.
Step 3: Sell the script to the highest bidder.