Wake up at 9:00 AM, immediately regret it.
10:00 AM - 11:00 AM: Coffee consumption and existential crisis
11:00 AM - 12:00 PM: Caffeine-fueled productivity (HAHA, just kidding, you'll just scroll through Twitter)
12:00 PM - 1:00 PM: Lunchtime: eat a sandwich, contemplate the meaning of life
1:00 PM - 2:00 PM: Afternoon nap (you've earned it)
2:00 PM - 5:00 PM: More coffee, more existential dread