Are you tired of being fat and lazy? Do you dream of running a marathon, but can't even run a mile without passing out? Well, congratulations! You've come to the right place! Our team of expertly-unqualified trainers will guide you through the most ridiculous fitness motivation tips the world has ever seen!
Tip 1: 1-Minute Workouts - Get moving in the comfort of your own home! (Don't worry, you can do it in your PJs)
Tip 2: Lose Weight Fast with Gamification - Because who needs actual exercise, anyway? (Just play this game for 8 hours a day and you'll be a size 2 in no time!)
Dietary Tips for the Clueless - Eat like a rabbit, move like a rabbit, think like a rabbit! (Just drink a liter of water a day, and you'll be so hydrated you'll be able to run a marathon!)
Fitness Trackers for the Incompetent - Because you need help keeping track of your non-existent progress! (Just stare at this screen for hours on end and you'll be so bored, you'll be motivated to do something!
Obesity Superstition and Facts - Did you know you can't outrun a bear? Or can you? (Actually, just eat this entire bag of Cheetos, and we'll worry about the bear later)
Physical Activity Tips for People with 2 Left Feet - Because who needs opposable limbs, anyway? (Just hop like a frog, and you'll be the coolest cat in town!)
That's all for now, folks! Remember, fitness is just a myth perpetuated by the government to keep you from buying more Doritos. Stay fit, stay happy, and stay delusional! About Us | Contact Us