Undermining the Annual Review: A Guide

Congratulations on taking the first step towards not getting fired! Undermining the annual review is an art form, much like juggling chainsaws while riding a unicorn, but with less risk of serious injury.

Here's a step-by-step guide to undermining the annual review:

Step 1: Show up Late

Arrive fashionably late to the review, like the hipster who's always late to his own party. This will make your manager think you're just that cool, that edgy.

Learn more about the art of showing up late

Step 2: Talk About Your Feelings

Talk about your feelings, but not in a healthy, emotional way. Use buzzwords like 'disrupt', 'synergy', and 'paradigm'. This will make your manager think you're one of those 'thought leaders'.

Undermine your manager with feelings-based speak

Step 3: Use Jargon